Crazy

My sister is crazy.

"Oh?" you say politely thinking something like, "Sheez, Claudia should work out her relationships."

Except my sister is really crazy. Always has been. Right now she is employed by the government as a paranoid schizophrenic. If you ask her, she works for the CIA as a secret operative.

The fact that she was always crazy is up for family debate. My sister was in a terrible car accident when she was 20 years old. According to one side of the argument, her delusions began as a result of the accident. Even though my maternal grandmother and paternal cousin were both paranoid schizophrenics, some people believe that my sister's mental disorder is not genetic.

The problem is that I remember her insanity when we were kids. She would bow out of roller skating, biking or our favorite activity (throwing ripe oranges at each other), to lay on her bed and day dream. My father thought she was reading, and gave her hundreds of books which collected dust on the shelf. My mother talked about her day dreaming in her bassinette for hours as an infant. She was lost in her own world decades before she was diagnosed.

She defended her insanity with an impulsive violent temper. She was a big heavy person. She was terrifying when she was angry. She hit, punched, slapped, and bit. She pushed me out of the car if she was driving.

Her ideas, and delusions, were defended with violence. I have noticed this pattern a lot lately - delusional insanity defended by violence. Have you noticed this as well?

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