Simple words. Yet they launched me into working on Denver Cereal.
I can’t count the number of times I stopped doing something because of something someone said. I stopped writing because a college professor told me I’d never be able to write a college English paper. I stopped running because I was told I ‘couldn’t’ because of my back injury. The list goes on and on.
Most people are more than willing to tell you NOT to do something – anything. There’s nothing more cruel than encouraging someone to be luke warm, mediocre and to not try.
Sure, if you don’t try, you won’t fail. If you don’t try, you won’t fall flat on your face. But what’s so wrong with falling? What’s the big deal about losing? Who cares if you fail?
We all fall. We all fail. We all lose.
Why not encourage people to try? Why not say go for it? What do we have to lose?
My kindness challenge for this week is to encourage everyone I interact with this week. I will shuck the self loathing and cruelty that goes along with telling someone what they cannot do.
i LOVE telling people to go for it! it’s so fun to be encouraging. and i get really irritated when people discourage other people.
Better be careful with that encouraging people thing, no one is used to it and you could wind up as the leader of the”cult of positive events.”
Only yesterday I was talking with a co-worker about my angst about driving 2.5 hrs to a concert (Rick Springfield). It’s in celebration of my birthday and I’m freaking out!
When I lived in GA I seemed fearless. NO ONE was there (family) to plant the seed of self doubt. I hopped in my car and drove 5 hrs to Savannah alone because I’d never been there.
Though my family is not directly putting those dreadful words in my head, I feel ‘this place’ has made me revert to the girl who didn’t try. I’ve become complacent. That’s a huge step from simply being content.
This blog post comes at a very crucial time. My friend (who also happens to live in Denver) keeps saying to me, “don’t live where you don’t love it” — that’s a big snack to feed on along with your words. Thank you.
Jameil – You’ve really gone for it in your life. You’re a shining example of trying – That speaks more than any words could do.
TWMark – I’d have to beat Rob Brezney out of that title!
MissRiss – Personally, I think we’re coming out of an age of fear and ego. I’ve had to shake the fear out of my own mind and start over. What would it take to shake away your fear?
This really resonates with me. When I was studying acting at the most prestigious drama school in America (which I auditioned for,) my mother constantly urged me to become a dental hygienist because very few people made it in acting, she said, but as a dental hygienist I would always be able to work.
I think she meant well and was trying to steer me into safe waters. But safety has its costs to the soul, while following ones dreams is always rewarding even if they don’t come true because staying true to ourselves matters more.
It seems we encounter people who tell us not to do things or that we can’t do them far more often than we are encouraged to follow our dreams. I often wonder what causes people to be so negative.
I am going to follow your lead this week and provided encouragement wherever I can!
Heart in SF – Gosh, how awful! I’m sorry to hear that your mother squelched your dreams. Did you get to act? I bet you were amazing, as I know you’re amazing now!
Perpstu – I think people are afraid. Also, if you get your dream, what excuse do they have for not living theirs?
We also have to watch what we say to ourselves. Whether conscious or unconscious.
Good goal.
I’ll tell others who’re wanting to become writers that if they’re afraid of rejection, choose another career. ;~P
Good stuff, Claudia. I just had a little experience with someone in my family doing the opposite of this and basically telling me I didn’t have what it takes to be a novelist because otherwise I’d be done with my book. I don’t believe that for one minute but it sticks with you a bit. Writers can deal with rejection but most often the personal digs from people you know or are related to are about stuff that has nothing to do with the quality of your writing.
Colleen – Yes, that’s very very true!
TC – That’s a very good point.
Los Angelista – I believe in you! Funny that your family, with your father as a professional musician, would be so negative.