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Food, inspired by Satan.

Gustave Dore's drawing in Milton's Paradise Lost

After our extensive Twizzler and Coffee research, we realized that there is an entire food category of “Inspired by Satan”. We thought it might be prudent to create a list of such foods, and food groups.

We are asking for your help to complete the list!
How do you know a food is inspired by Satan? 1.

1. It calls to you from the cabinet, the store, the shop.
2. It has no real nutritional value.

3. It can be left out for Satan’s anagram. (Oh come on! Santa?)

Please feel free to add to our definition.

The Food, inspired by Satan, list:

1. Twizzlers

2. Pop Tarts (click for creepy pop tart page)

3. Chocolate chips

4. Cinnabon or any cinnamon roll product.

5. Ice Cream

6. Potato + Grease: Crisps, chips, french fries, hash browns, deep fried tator tots, etc.

Please note that we did not include cigarettes, alcohol or caffeine because we know that these were invented by God as a way to test the very nature of human beings.

What’s on your list?

1. The word “Satan” means “adversity” in Hebrew. As in, the adversity created by either eating, or not eating, a Satan inspired food.

19 Responses to Food, inspired by Satan.
  1. Colleen
    August 23, 2007 | 3:10 pm

    I vote for Twizzlers for evil food. Eat too many, and you get the licorice craps.

  2. lone grey squirrel
    August 23, 2007 | 5:26 pm

    The obvious one is “Devil Food Cake” but Chocolate Bourbon Cake with ice cream is my personal nemesis.

  3. apos
    August 23, 2007 | 5:56 pm

    Mmm barbeque porkskins?oh how I adore thee?unless the makers put them hard bastids in the bag?a fine way to chip a bloody tooth. Fortunately, now I know to look and admire before shovelling one in my gaping maw of a gob.

  4. Open Grove Claudia
    August 24, 2007 | 12:05 am

    Colleen – I had no idea about licorice craps! I clearly need to do more research

    Squirrelly – Chocolate Bourbon Cake?? I’ve never dreamed of such a thing. Only Satan would.

    Apos – You are adapting to Southern United States life. I’ve never tried one… tempting though…. I wonder if they have one at the sev….

  5. furiousBall
    August 24, 2007 | 12:18 am

    i’ll have one of all of those please

  6. BottleBlonde
    August 24, 2007 | 3:06 am

    My ears perked up like a dog’s the moment I read ‘Twizzler and coffee research’.

    P.S. Milkshakes and carrot cake are clearly the work of Satan. CLEARLY. My thighs said so.

  7. Josie
    August 24, 2007 | 8:56 am

    Pancakes with butter and Canadian maple syrup.

    I think I’ll go have some.

    Hey, the devil made me do it.

  8. Odat
    August 24, 2007 | 10:35 am

    Pretzels covered with peanut butter and chocolate!
    Peace

  9. Open Grove Claudia
    August 24, 2007 | 4:46 pm

    FuriousBall – I’ll send some along.

    Bottle Blonde – Yes, I do think that Satan inspired milkshakes – and certainly that cream cheese frosting is the work of the devil.

    Josie – That’s my girl!

    Odat – Ewwww! Yummy.

  10. Michael C
    August 25, 2007 | 12:21 am

    Satan Food inspires guilt which can only be quelled by eating more…

    Satan Food for me is anything with melted cheese…anything!!

    Thanks for stopping by my blog!!!

  11. eastcoastdweller
    August 25, 2007 | 12:50 pm

    Deviled ham. I could eat a pound of that stuff in one sitting.

    Lunch meat. (Salami, pepperoni, pastrami, etc.

    The crispy coating on fried chicken.

    And my absolute favorite weakness, probably a good thing it only comes out during Christmas — EGG NOG!

  12. leslie
    August 25, 2007 | 2:46 pm

    Cheesecake

  13. Open Grove Claudia
    August 25, 2007 | 4:07 pm

    Michael – Yes, guilt for eating it, guilt when you don’t eat it. Hmmmm…. melted cheese. Do you have a favorite cheese or any at all??

    East Coast Dweller – Deviled Ham? I honestly don’t think I’ve ever had it, although we should have a category for all the “-oni” foods – what you call lunch meet. I love egg nog too! We should have a party!

    Leslie – Cheesecake has never called to me but I know people who shop in NYC specifically for a type of cheesecake. So I think you’re on to something.

  14. Michael C
    August 25, 2007 | 4:31 pm

    Pretty much any cheese at all…as long as it is melted ;-)

  15. Open Grove Claudia
    August 25, 2007 | 5:40 pm

    Michael – Yummy – maybe we should make that a category too!

  16. Michael C
    August 25, 2007 | 7:48 pm

    That’s a god idea. File it in the food that will eventually kill you, even though you’ll enjoy the long slow death!

  17. Open Grove Claudia
    August 25, 2007 | 9:03 pm

    Michael – You\’re going to die anyway – why not enjoy the process?

  18. Nila
    August 26, 2007 | 8:32 am

    Chocolate shakes from In & Out.

    Enteman’s little cinnamon donuts. I could eat the whole box and they’re 240 calories for 3 donuts. Scary.

    Onion rings

  19. Open Grove Claudia
    August 26, 2007 | 2:58 pm

    Nila – OH YES!! Those are devilish creations for sure.

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